Monthly Archives: March 2013

“Decoy Danni” by Heinrich Hippohurdler

There comes a time in every young monster’s life when the adult fangs have grown in, the claws are as sharp as they are going to get, and the lust for blood has reached a boiling point, and that is … Continue reading

Posted in writing | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

“Lottery” by Randy Long

Holy shit! All 6 numbers. I’ve won the lottery! Wow. I’m going to Olympia to get 3 million dollars. I can’t believe I won. I’m so broke I don’t even have the money for gas. I’m so broke. It’s the … Continue reading

Posted in humor, stories | Tagged , | 1 Comment

“Dilly the Evil Squirrel (Billy’s Evil Twin, Dilly the Squirrel)” by Randy Long

Dilly was an evil squirrel, a mean and rambunctious squirrel. Dilly would drop nuts on people walking under trees. Dilly would chase other squirrels and bite their tails and laugh. Dilly was always chasing other squirrels, and sometimes he would … Continue reading

Posted in adventure, humor, squirrels, stories | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

“The Great Chair” by Randy Long

My mom sat on her throne, which was passed down from her husband, two couches and one chair, in the middle of the room. For years she sat in the middle of the room, sitting in her chair for all … Continue reading

Posted in humor, stories | Tagged , | Leave a comment

“Billy the Squirrel” by Randy Long

[Once again, we have a guest author at The Primitive Entertainment Workshop. Join me in welcoming Randy Long to the ranks!] Billy the squirrel comes down the big maple tree to find the food on the ground that the older … Continue reading

Posted in humor, squirrels, stories | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

“I Fight at You” by Richard F. Yates

—Richard F. Yates (Primitive Thoughtician and Supreme Bunny Lord of The P.E.W.) SUPPORT INDEPENDENT FOLKS WHO ARE JUST MAKING STUFF BECAUSE THEY LOVE IT!!! [Reconfirmed: 17 Aug. 2017]

Posted in art, digital art, drawings, humor | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

“The Marshmallow Queen” by Richard F. Yates

The Marshmallow Queen sat alone in her room sipping tea from an empty cup and listening to the bumps and crashes from the darkened room next door. “The poor dear is angry again,” the Queen said, and she smiled, sadly. … Continue reading

Posted in ghosts, humor, stories | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

“How to Get Gravy Out of a Stained Shirt” by Admiral Thomas J. Haha

Burn the shirt in a public place while screaming as if in terror —Haha [Reconfirmed: 16 Aug. 2017]

Posted in art, humor, poetry, pranks | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

“W!Z!B!” by Mr. Smog Monster

On this day, 22 March 2013, after several meetings of the Secret Tribunal on Horseshittists’ Ethics, and in light of the murders of long time H.S. members, Grover Von Eyesocker, Jr., and H.S. founder, Dr. Augeas P. Houyhnhnm, the Horseshittists … Continue reading

Posted in art, art theory, humor, manifestos, philosophy, pranks | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

“Local Zoologist Takes Own Life” by Starbuck Fosterbreath

[The following article is reprinted from the Misty Mountain Gazette, Henpeck, WA.] 20 Mar. 2013–Henpeck, WA— Dr. Augeas P. Houyhnhnm, zoologist, was discovered dead this morning in his home in northern Henpeck. Senior Detective, Joe Smaltz, has declared the death … Continue reading

Posted in horseshittists, humor, stories | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments